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“Ack! Why can’t you just get on the phone and talk to me, EssaySnark!??”

November 12, 2019 by EssaySnark Leave a Comment

We don’t do free pre-sales consultations.

We’re not interested in blowing smoke up your patootey about how awesome you are and yes you’re going to make it into Harvard just fine, don’t worry about that GMAT score.*

Heck, even after signing up for our MBA admissions consulting services, we don’t even get on the phone with you to “talk through” your ideas.

Instead, we give you a structured process where you get to learn stuff,

It’s the “teach you to fish” model, which is designed for those who are smart, and want to be independent, and not chained at the hip to a consultant for every decision they make through their app process. It also lets us keep our prices low, where everyone can sign up for just the level of support that they need, which can empower more people to try for their bschool dreams even if they don’t come from affluence and luxury.

But there’s another reason we have structured our consulting services this way.

It’s because every time you reach out with a question, you’re forced to think through what you’re literally asking.

You get to practice putting your thoughts down into words. You get to work on making your point concisely, and being specific about where you’re unclear.

It lets you practice these skills that you’re going to be using in your MBA apps.

Every time you pose a question to us, you have to put it in writing. You have to make sure you’re making sense, that you know what you’re saying. That process alone sometimes helps the answer to materialize in your brain — without ever submitting the question. It engages you in a new level of understanding of the material you’re working with, and the techniques that you’re learning.

Because writing a good MBA essay is at least as much about learning new techniques as it is in figuring out what story will be a good match for the prompt.

The keyword there of course is writing. By engaging in an all-written relationship here, it helps you to clarify your own thinking, and sharpen your abilities as a clear writer.

There’s one more ulterior motive behind this philosophy of consulting we’ve designed, and it is this:

Leadership is about making decisions in the face of confusion. It’s about navigating uncertainty, dealing with pressure, taking in all the available inputs and forming your own strategy. It is most definitely about becoming better equipped at dealing with ambiguity.

If you’re aiming for a top school like Harvard, where the case method is integral to all that they do, well, you’re not going to be able to call a friend. You’re not going to be able to go to someone else on the side for the answers. You’re going to have to learn to deal with the stress of being put on the spot, and perform even in the face of all of your doubts. All your imposter syndrome. All your difficult emotions that tell you you don’t know what you’re doing.

You’ll have to put in the time and effort figuring stuff out on your own, and in your study groups too where you’ll have peers to commiserate with, and support you (which we offer too with our collaboration partner

One reason that we stick to this online-only support format is because so much of your application success will be achieved through clear writing. This gets you the practice of getting your thinking down solid, so that you can easily articulate the ideas in your apps — there’s a method to all of the madness in the form of the constraints that we present to clients in this process!)

We want our clients to feel empowered, and our experience shows that learning to do it yourself is so gratifying. Sometimes when things feel overwhelming and confusing, all we need to do is to help you step back, with the gentle reminder: Trust yourself.

You’ve got what it takes to do this, Grasshopper.

Yes it’s work. Yes it’s hard. But you can do it.

We absolutely are here to support you. Got questions on feedback? Need help unpacking what we laid out in an essay review? We’ve got your back. You can submit questions in response to feedback privately in your SnarkCenter portal. We know how tough this can be, and are here as cheerleader and coach, and guide. We’ll tell you where things look good, and where they’re off, or not optimized, and point out that this is “telling” when you need to be “showing,” and referring you back to the tutorials and resources that walk through these skills.

Tackle that learning curve with us on your first app, and you’ll be in very good shape to tackle others on your own. Or enlist our help on four schools straight out of the gate, and we’ll be there by your side as you write write write, learn, reflect, start over, and write some more.

Questions are always welcome at any stage of our work together.

We’ve designed it so that even the process of asking questions will benefit your end product in the long run.

 
 
You may also be interested in:

  • The hardest part of learning to write good essays (really recommend everyone tackling this project read that!)
  • Essays are not a writing test. They’re a thinking test.

 
 

*If you want to REALLY know if you’ve got a shot at the schools you are aiming for: Our Comprehensive Profile Review will dig into the details and help you understand how you’re positioned in this process!!

 
 

Filed Under: EssaySnark products & services, general snark Tagged With: cheerleading

« Previous: ($) Aiming the post-MBA career goal appropriately
Next: ($) Please don’t paper the country with apps »

So who the heck is EssaySnark, anyway?!

We're the snarky experts in MBA admissions!

Sometimes amused and often appalled by what candidates write in their MBA applications to top bschools, EssaySnark created this little blahg to share common mistakes. Learn from them and avoid making admissions directors laugh (or want to hurl) when they read your essays. If you are hoping to have your essay reviewed anonymously on the blahg for free, submit it for consideration.

Want EssaySnark's personal assistance with your MBA applications? Start with our menu of consulting services and please read the Help FAQ to learn how we operate. Still have questions after doing all that? Email Team EssaySnark at gethelpnow at essaysnark dot com.

Good luck on your apps, Brave Supplicant!

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From a BSer January 2020:
"love the guide books!"


CLASS OF 2023 MBA APPLICATION STRATEGY GUIDES

     
    The 2020 Berkeley-Haas MBA Application Guide - updated for the Class of 2023 application!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Berkeley Haas - refreshed and updated, with brainstorming exercises and structured maps to help you focus your stories!
   
    The 2020-2021 NYU Stern MBA Application Guide that covers the main essay, the EQ Endorsement and Pick Six!
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    The 2020-2021 Columbia MBA Application Guide
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    The 2020 Harvard MBA Application Guide - completely overhauled and updated for the coronavirus era!
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    The 2020-2021 Duke Essay Guide - covers the 25 Random Things essay and all the rest too!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Duke Fuqua - up to date for the current season!
   
    The 2020-2021 MIT Essay Guide covers the org chart, the contacts for two references, and additional tips for the cover letter and 'introduce yourself' video -- and everything else you need to know!
SnarkStrategies Guide for MIT Sloan MBA - totally revised for the Class of 2023!
   
    The 2020-2021 Tuck Essay Guide has been refreshed with latest insights and advice for your essays about "investing generously" and "why Tuck"!
SnarkStrategies Guide for the Dartmouth Tuck MBA - completely overhauled for 2020, to help you demonstrate how you are nice, aware, etc stuff!
   
    The Yale SOM MBA Application Guide for Class of 2023 candidates!
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    The 2020-2021 Chicago Booth MBA Application Guide - ready to go to support your Class of 2023 essay strategy!
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    The 2020 Wharton MBA Application Guide - even more advice on how to get to a win with those essays!
SnarkStrategies Guide for The Wharton School - with new tips for 2020!
   
    The 2020 Kellogg Essay Guide - with a full methodology to identify your 'lasting impact' and your 'values' -- plus tips on 2020 world events and applicability to your essays!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Kellogg MBA - updated and revised for the new realities of 2020!    
      The 2020 Stanford MBA Application Guide - for "what matters most" in your MBA application!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Stanford GSB for the Class of 2023
   
    The 2020-2021 UCLA Anderson MBA Application Guide - updated for Class of 2023 on "impact"!
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UCLA
   
   

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What were we snarking about at this time in past years?

  • 2020: Now that most apps are in: What to do with your life
  • 2019: For reading and reflection
  • 2019: ($) "What if School D gave me money but I really want to go to School A?"
  • 2018: "EssaySnark, what will help me more to prepare for my big-time MBA interview?"
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  • 2014: Q to the 'Snark: "Etiquette on accepting a MBA scholarship offer if you might ditch out later."
  • 2013: Success Story! With industrial sized bottles of vodka!
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