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We tried. We really did. But we’ve caved.

October 10, 2016 by EssaySnark Leave a Comment

So many times over the past year and a half, we’ve been tempted to blahg about the person who’s become the Republican candidate for President of the United States. So many teachable moments – and some positives, too, actually! There has been debate in Snarkville about it (not nearly as heated as the debate last night!) but in Fall 2015 we decided we’d just leave it alone. We don’t want this to be a political place. You come here for snark about bschool admissions; there’s more than enough snark out there on the interwebs about all of this other nonsense. We wanted this to be a safe space (ha!) where you could enjoy living in a parallel dimension where none of that RL stuff ever invaded.

But then last week we posted a snippet of a field report from a last-year BSer that referenced a political candidate and on Friday, we were served with an opportunity that was too good to pass up.

Anyway, it’s not like we’ve never used politics or current events as fodder for the blahg before. We referenced the 2008 Democratic Primary debate between Obama and Clinton in a 2014 “Are you likeable?” post about interviewing. And we actually covered what we’re going to talk about today last year in this post about hacked emails where Sony executives made jokes in poor taste about the President.

What we got on Friday was a scandalous recording from ten years ago where this Presidential candidate said some things about women, which prompted the candidate to release a video Friday night ostensibly apologizing for what he said. (If you have not seen either or both of these videos yet, what rock have you been hiding under??? We’re not about to link to them directly, they’re easy enough to find on your own if you need to catch up.)

In the apology video, the candidate made the classic assertion:

“Anyone who knows me knows these words do not reflect who I am.”

Why on earth is EssaySnark going to such pains to lay all of this out for you?

It’s because it’s the most common assertion in the world and it pretty much always is bogus.

When you say to the adcom, “My grades in college do not reflect my abilities.”

Or when you say, “My GMAT score does not…”

Well guess what?

These things DO reflect. In fact, by the very nature of them – words, behavior, test scores, GPA – that’s EXACTLY what they do.

The only thing we have to evaluate our fellow human being and to see what they’re made of is the things that they do and the things that they say.

That is ESPECIALLY true in your MBA applications.

Your academic record is a sum total of all of your abilities – or if not your abilities, your willingness to put forth the effort.

The words a person speaks come from their thoughts. Nobody will ever say something that does not originate in their mind. If you’re claiming that your mind is not a reflection of who you are, well, sorry but that does not fly.

Same with this classic (and useless) excuse about academic performance or results of a standardized test.

When you trot out this “does not reflect” line, you’re basically insulting your audience. You’re saying, “Look, this happened, OK? Much as I’d like to pretend that it didn’t, and have tried to hide it, now that it’s out in the open and part of the record, I guess I need to deal with it. But you shouldn’t judge me on it. Why not? Because I say so.”

If you find yourself in a situation that you need to explain something negative from your profile to the adcom in your MBA applications, then…

  >> The rest of this post is for paying blahg members only – log in to view.   <<

 

 


[/end special little tip section for premium blahg members – thanks for supporting the site!]
 

THAT is how you handle a difficult situation from your past. THAT is how you neutralize a negative in your profile – or even, best case scenario, turn it into a positive. THAT is how you avoid insulting your adcom reader’s intelligence with the fallback and totally transparent and empty claim that everyone says when they’re busted with something that they shouldn’t have done, but they did.

To bring this around to a positive and mention the original reason for the Snarkville debate on whether or not to reference this man on the blahg: Everyone by now has heard him speak. What struck us even a year ago and continues to this day is his speaking style. He speaks in short, declarative sentences using simple language and structure. Most of his sentences are of the basic form: subject -> verb -> object. (Usually with some big adjectives and adverbs thrown in.) This style has been evaluated as speaking at a third-grader’s level , or by others in a more rigid analysis, a sixth-grader , which to some sounds like a criticism, but it’s actually a technique that invites clarity.

We are not about to suggest that anyone model their MBA essays on this person’s style – but we will say that writing more simply is usually an advantage in your applications. (We will leave the question of the content of this person’s speech for you to evaluate.)

Filed Under: "show don't tell", low GMAT, low GPA, optional essay

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So who the heck is EssaySnark, anyway?!

We're the snarky experts in MBA admissions!

Sometimes amused and often appalled by what candidates write in their MBA applications to top bschools, EssaySnark created this little blahg to share common mistakes. Learn from them and avoid making admissions directors laugh (or want to hurl) when they read your essays. If you are hoping to have your essay reviewed anonymously on the blahg for free, submit it for consideration.

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Good luck on your apps, Brave Supplicant!

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From a BSer January 2020:
"love the guide books!"


CLASS OF 2023 MBA APPLICATION STRATEGY GUIDES

     
    The 2020 Berkeley-Haas MBA Application Guide - updated for the Class of 2023 application!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Berkeley Haas - refreshed and updated, with brainstorming exercises and structured maps to help you focus your stories!
   
    The 2020-2021 NYU Stern MBA Application Guide that covers the main essay, the EQ Endorsement and Pick Six!
SnarkStrategies Guide for NYU - discusses your requirements for the Class of 2023 essays!
   
    The 2020-2021 Columbia MBA Application Guide
SnarkStrategies Guide for Columbia Business School for 2020-2021 applications
   
    The 2020 Harvard MBA Application Guide - completely overhauled and updated for the coronavirus era!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Harvard Business School!
   
    The 2020-2021 Duke Essay Guide - covers the 25 Random Things essay and all the rest too!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Duke Fuqua - up to date for the current season!
   
    The 2020-2021 MIT Essay Guide covers the org chart, the contacts for two references, and additional tips for the cover letter and 'introduce yourself' video -- and everything else you need to know!
SnarkStrategies Guide for MIT Sloan MBA - totally revised for the Class of 2023!
   
    The 2020-2021 Tuck Essay Guide has been refreshed with latest insights and advice for your essays about "investing generously" and "why Tuck"!
SnarkStrategies Guide for the Dartmouth Tuck MBA - completely overhauled for 2020, to help you demonstrate how you are nice, aware, etc stuff!
   
    The Yale SOM MBA Application Guide for Class of 2023 candidates!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Yale SOM - updated for 2020-2021
   
    The 2020-2021 Chicago Booth MBA Application Guide - ready to go to support your Class of 2023 essay strategy!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Chicago Booth for this year's MBA app!
   
    The 2020 Wharton MBA Application Guide - even more advice on how to get to a win with those essays!
SnarkStrategies Guide for The Wharton School - with new tips for 2020!
   
    The 2020 Kellogg Essay Guide - with a full methodology to identify your 'lasting impact' and your 'values' -- plus tips on 2020 world events and applicability to your essays!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Kellogg MBA - updated and revised for the new realities of 2020!    
      The 2020 Stanford MBA Application Guide - for "what matters most" in your MBA application!
SnarkStrategies Guide for Stanford GSB for the Class of 2023
   
    The 2020-2021 UCLA Anderson MBA Application Guide - updated for Class of 2023 on "impact"!
SnarkStrategies Guide for 
UCLA
   
   

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What were we snarking about at this time in past years?

  • 2020: ($) What to consider with your Kellogg (or other school's Rd 3 Flex) app: Recs, timing, optional essay
  • 2020: ($) Coronavirus and the MBA: Kellogg changes the game
  • 2019: Is your GMAT good enough?
  • 2019: Volunteering and MBA applicants from the non-profit world
  • 2018: ($) If you took the GMAT while you were in college and now X years later you're applying for an MBA
  • 2016: Success Story! Deciding between two offers: "I was surprised by how the more I thought about it..."
  • 2015: ($) Continued from yesterday: When will Harvard release their MBA app? And which app should you do first?
  • 2015: Which schools release MBA essay questions when?
  • 2014: Bschool is all about food.
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