You’re writing essays, and we’re critiquing them.
Kinda miserable task on both ends. 😀
In both cases, on some days, it requires a tremendous act of will to even get started. Especially when everyone else in the entire world is out there having a giddy holiday vacation. But noooooooo. You’re stuck at the computer working. Because those mean old admissions people decided to put the deadline for Round 2 directly after the holidays.
(Errr, really it’s because you’re a procrastinating slacker, but who are we to judge?)
Anyway, snarking essays is not any easier than writing them, and over the years we’ve developed a small arsenal of tricks to get us motivated when we *baby tantrum* just don’t feel like it.
One BSer of an admissions season long past confessed to an indulgence in gummi worms to get through the slog. We prefer gummi bears, actually (the German kind, not those lame overly soft American versions – unless they’re soaked in vodka and then we might be tempted).
Candy is a well-known and universally acceptable crutch that helps BSers everywhere in crunch-mode. We’re not revealing any well-guarded secrets by announcing that. (And no, we don’t suggest vodka be combined in any fashion with essay-writing; you can save that for when the apps are in!) One unique twist though: We preserve candy for ONLY doing essays. Meaning, if there is a stash of candy available, EssaySnark is not allowed to touch it unless essays are being critiqued. Then, all bets are off; said candy will be consumed in quantities.
What we’ve found works better than candy is bubble gum. Smacking and popping a big old wad of the stuff does wonders to get through a stack of essays. It also annoys the heck out of anyone in your vicinity, so pursue that one with caution.
We also have to have music playing when doing essays – well OK, not “have to” but it sure does help. Oddly though, we often have to TURN THE MUSIC OFF when writing blahg posts. No idea why there’s a difference, but sometimes the music interferes with the ability to think of the right word we want to say when writing new stuff here. Doesn’t make any sense since it requires just as much reading and writing to do an essay critique. Or maybe the difference is that we can do an essay critique in our sleep, practically. Regardless, the ‘Snark brain is a confusing place. You probably don’t want to spend too much time there.
Since all of you are (ahem) presumably writing essays this weekend, we figured we’d share those little tidbits.
And no that does not mean that you should delay the start of your essay-writing project until after you’ve gone out to the store to get candy and gum. If you’re having trouble being productive, this post may help.
Or just turn off the darned Internet and WRITE.
Yeah, about that?
Do you have any weird tricks to help you write your essays?