($) essay critique! Yale essay 1 – “What motivates your decision to pursue an MBA?”

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1. prodizy says

   October 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm

   Great review. Thanks for posting it.

   I am in the similar dilemma in terms of short term goals. I have entrepreneurial background and I want to do an MBA to start a firm that I really love with the help of platform, network, and resources an MBA offers. But as an international student, I am afraid to say that I want to do it right after MBA(I realize it is pretty difficult to achieve, and requires lot of sacrifices even while doing the MBA). Does it sound to ambitious? Arrogant?

   So we generally search for other avenues such as being consultant for X number of years and then start our firm. It’s ridiculous, but we are helpless here. Help us out 🙂

   Thanks,
   Prodizy

   • essaysnark says

     October 15, 2013 at 4:25 am

     @prodizy, we often find it more credible when someone says they will start a firm straight after bschool, than someone who claims they’ll do so “eventually” or “someday”. Each pitch needs to be executed differently, but given the right background, and the right detail and positioning with the startup as a short-term goal, it can work. As you saw from our reaction on this draft, the consultant thing in between just makes the whole plan seem disingenuous.

     EssaySnark

     • prodizy says

       October 15, 2013 at 4:43 am

       Thanks. That gives us some confidence that we may escape from buying the ding analysis service from you after round 1 🙂

       Thanks,
       Prodizy