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($) essay critique! Yale essay 1 – “What motivates your decision to pursue an MBA?”

October 14, 2013 by EssaySnark - Discusses Yale SOM

Given that the Yale deadline is now three weeks past, this is likely to piss off the BSer who sent in this essay… but maybe not, since they sent it in a day before the deadline. Not exactly enough time for us to turn around a free essay review (though often plenty of time to…


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Filed Under: consulting, entrepreneurship, essay critique Bschools: Yale SOM

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Here's what others have said about this:

  1. prodizy says

    October 14, 2013 at 5:29 pm

    Great review. Thanks for posting it.

    I am in the similar dilemma in terms of short term goals. I have entrepreneurial background and I want to do an MBA to start a firm that I really love with the help of platform, network, and resources an MBA offers. But as an international student, I am afraid to say that I want to do it right after MBA(I realize it is pretty difficult to achieve, and requires lot of sacrifices even while doing the MBA). Does it sound to ambitious? Arrogant?

    So we generally search for other avenues such as being consultant for X number of years and then start our firm. It’s ridiculous, but we are helpless here. Help us out 🙂

    Thanks,
    Prodizy

    • essaysnark says

      October 15, 2013 at 4:25 am

      @prodizy, we often find it more credible when someone says they will start a firm straight after bschool, than someone who claims they’ll do so “eventually” or “someday”. Each pitch needs to be executed differently, but given the right background, and the right detail and positioning with the startup as a short-term goal, it can work. As you saw from our reaction on this draft, the consultant thing in between just makes the whole plan seem disingenuous.

      EssaySnark

      • prodizy says

        October 15, 2013 at 4:43 am

        Thanks. That gives us some confidence that we may escape from buying the ding analysis service from you after round 1 🙂

        Thanks,
        Prodizy

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What were we snarking about at this time in past years?

  • 2020: ($) What to consider with your Kellogg (or other school's Rd 3 Flex) app: Recs, timing, optional essay
  • 2020: ($) Coronavirus and the MBA: Kellogg changes the game
  • 2019: Is your GMAT good enough?
  • 2019: Volunteering and MBA applicants from the non-profit world
  • 2018: ($) If you took the GMAT while you were in college and now X years later you're applying for an MBA
  • 2016: Success Story! Deciding between two offers: "I was surprised by how the more I thought about it..."
  • 2015: ($) Continued from yesterday: When will Harvard release their MBA app? And which app should you do first?
  • 2015: Which schools release MBA essay questions when?
  • 2014: Bschool is all about food.
  • 2013: Researching MBA programs
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